Just Some Pictures

I like to spend my free time experimenting with photos. There have been a few times where I've stepped back and been proud of the "masterpieces" I've created. I'd like to share some of those with you.



This was one of my favourites, an older version of me holding the young version of me. The brightness of the two is kind of obvious, but I liked it anyway. Just the whole idea of an "inner child."





Amy used to have a crush on this guy (he was on Days of our Lives), so this is the cute couple together. (this was a long time ago, Amy was like 10)







This is actually a frightening picture of me, so let's just move on...






Okay the first one I didn't make (the one with Hermione) but the second one I did, but changed it slightly to make it with my picture. I also changed the teacher in the background.






I don't know how well you can see it, but it's a frame and the border is pictures of me with friends and family and people. I kind of like this, but I wouldn't know what to put in the middle.








Too many Chrissy's maybe








Like to pout much?









And the last one, my very favourite one I'll leave you with. I write short stories about a girl named Leslie Perks who goes to Hogwarts with Harry Potter and stuff. Her character is based on me, so I found this wallpaper of Hermione and I liked it a lot so I used the format to make a wallpaper of my character, Leslie. It's my favourite created picture up to date.
















CHRISSY

My Update

So I've been told that I need to update my blog. My reasoning for not updating is a) I've been so upset about stuff that I haven't had any spurts of creative ideas for my blog and b) Nobody seems to read my blog anymore, because nobody comments but apparently I've been told my blogs are being read, but just not commented. So here's an update on my life:
First off: I had my ear specialist appointment on Wednesday and well that went horribly wrong. He's only been practicing for 2 years apparently and his answer to all my questions were "I don't know." Also, he said there was nothing wrong with my ears, which was ludacrous (spelling?) because they've been hurting me constantly, so finally, the doctor said there was a very little bit of fluid on my right ear and he could drain it for me. So there I was, alone on the examining table, as he dropped a bit of liquid on my eardrum which burned a hole through it and then he drained the liquid. So now my ear is killing me and he told me that if it didn't work, I would pretty much have to live with the pain and take Advil for it, whenever it was necessary. I was so upset in the room, as I was alone and I'm a wuss when it comes to doctors and stuff, and I just kept wishing I had someone there to talk me through it, hold my hand and stuff. It hurt a lot. So now, my ear is not only still hurting, but I have lost even more hearing as a result! I really hope that's just the eardrum healing from the hole being burned through it. I don't know. So that's my ear experience.
On a happier note: I tried a Pogo last night. You know those little hotdogs wrapped in bread on a stick? Oh man, it was so delicious!!!!!!! I devoured it and rekindled my youth. So I am no longer a vegetarian because I eat hotdogs. My friend Kristie told me that now that I can eat "all the leftovers" (in hotdogs), I can pretty much eat any kind of meat now. (Though I still am not fond of chicken, which I tried not too long ago.) I also went to the Mandarin on Saturday night and tried Saki (hot wine). Ew. That was gross.
And if any of you are interested, I am throwing a Karaoke Night on Saturday, February 25, 2006 from 7-10p.m. The theme is going to be "Are you stuck in the February Blahs? Come and get cheered up at our Karaoke Night." So it will be bright and colorful and fun, to get away from the blahs of winter. So come. It's at church.
I guess that's pretty much it. I'm excited about being the door person at Larissa's wedding and I have 2 tests and an essay next week so I'm swamped. And woot, there's a general meeting at the church tomorrow night. *Cough cough* I think I'm getting sick.

CHRISSY

Home Safe and Sound

Yay! We've returned home from Avalanche safe and sound and full of God's grace. God was truly at work this weekend in the lives of the kids as well as the leaders. I'm surprised at how much I got out of it spiritually, especially when it was designed for kids. I learned how to better myself as a leader, I learned I need to trust God more and I learned that I can be a very caring individual when I ask the Holy Spirit to lead me. I feel like I can do anything now, with God's help.
Saturday night was the most amazing part. I need to tell you. One of my girls accepted Christ for the first time, another recommited, one said they "sort of" gave their life over to God, one still wasn't sure and the other one I haven't even had a chance to talk to yet, but he was kneeling down saying the same prayer. Our speaker said if you wanted to make God the boss of your life, kneel down in front of you, bow your head and don't care what others think because a) their eyes are closed and b) It's God, and you don't have to be "cool" around God. It was incredible. But I was scared, because our speaker said to the kids who knelt to talk to your leader and ask what they should do. I was terrified. It would probably be one of the most important questions I would ever answer. Kari and I prayed together before we went to small group. And it went amazingly. Kari and I worked well together. When I was stuck, and didn't know what to say, she'd say something amazing, and vice versa. It's amazing how God is working.
Now we need to pray for these newly born Christians to work really hard to stay on track and not come down too hard off the God-high, but instead to keep worshipping God, even in a dark world.
Thank you for your prayers

CHRISSY

Lost Wins For Best Drama

My favourite TV show as of now is ABC's "Lost." It is into its second season already and I am still very much addicted to the famous cliffhanger show. I have watched it since it's debut last year, and last year, it became a Wednesday night ritual for Michelle and I, sitting on the edge of our seats, mouth wide open, eyes wide open, screaming at the commercials to hurry up and be over. Those days are over, as Lost was pushed back an hour, and being that Thursdays are very early days for Michelle, she usually hits the hay. So I find myself going back to old habits, yelling at commercials, and realizing how silly I must look, since nobody can hear or see me.

Oh well, point of the matter is, I was very proud when Lost won best TV drama at the Golden Globes (YAY!) I must admit though, it is driving me nuts that I have to wait a whole week to find out what happens. The cliffhangers drive me mad. Right now, I have so many theories as to what is really going on, and I have heard certain rumors about the show, so I don't even know. (Don't worry, I won't spoil them). Except I heard they are casting a new character, a 16-year-old girl named Jessica. I have a feeling she'll be with the Others, since we haven't heard anything about her on the "good" side of the island yet. My theory is that she will be the daughter of the French woman, with a different name. That she will be with the Others, but is really Danielle's daughter. (OOOOH).

My favourite character on the show is Kate, because she's so misunderstood. Everyone sees her as this criminal, and yes that's wrong, but I think there's more to her than just a criminal mind. I think she did what she did out of some kind of motivational love, and it drove her to a sense of protection for her mother. (If you haven't seen the show, you'll be clueless as to what I'm even talking about.)

So yay Lost for winning Best Drama. They totally deserved it.

CHRISSY

Here Comes The Avalanche

The weekend is upon us! I have been waiting for this weekend for quite a while. It is Avalanche 2006! For those of you who don't know, Avalanche is a junior high retreat at a nice resort up north. I have had the privilage to take some junior highs up last year, where they had a really great time, and now I get to take some more up this weekend! I'm very excited, as I have been able to come to this retreat when I was in high school (Blizzard) and now I get to be a leader. It's very fun.
It's very exciting to watch these kids experience God in a way they've never known. Through worship and through prayer. The questions they come up with and the way they can realize that God can be really fun! It's a very fun-packed weekend with rock climbing and tubing and lots of other fun stuff. This year, they added karaoke, I'm so there. It's cool. My kids are very excited about basketball and dodgeball. I can't wait to go tubing, but most of all, I'm excited for the session. Our speaker is very good with this age group; the kids actually listen to him.
We get the opportunity to be Team Blast this year, which is great, because I have always been Team Blast (with the exception of one year when I was Storm). This is great because I have already got the Blast Spirit!
It should be a great weekend. I'm looking forward to getting to know the kids better, and having a nice, spiritual weekend away, with Kari. I can't wait.
We're leaving Friday, so please pray for good weather and a safe trip there and back.
CHRISSY

Young or Uncultured?

Okay, I have lived with Brad and Michelle for almost two years now and during this time, I have been subjected to many different kinds of movies and music. Yet as I continue to learn about the popular culture before my time, I am still at a loss as to what is going on half of the time. Though I now know who the Beatles are and U2, etc, there is still a lot I am uneducated about. There are still times when Brad and Michelle will be talking about somebody (let's say the name is Kate Bush) and I will prompty turn my head and comment "Who?" My response is usually either a shudder, a cringe or something getting hucked at me, before hearing "Go to your room!" In my defense, I must confess my era of music was different than theirs. Anybody born in the eighties can sympathethize with me that our bands included the Backstreet Boys, Hanson, Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, and of course, the much loved Spice Girls. This was my repertoire of music, the pop era, and I enjoyed it very much. It's gone now, especially in my house where it wasn't even considered "real music", where the Spice Girls are compared to something along the lines of a cat in a microwave oven. (Okay so I add libbed a bit, but I'm not that far off).
Yes, most of this has to do with the age difference (although on the lifespan development chart, Brad, Michelle and I are in the same stage in life - early adulthood). Most of the music and movies they enjoy are either from before I was born, or shortly thereafter, when I was just a toddler, probably not even knowing what pop culture was. This gap is always evident when the three of us play games such as Scene It or Trivial Pursuit Pop Culture where I practically don't exist in the game, as I barely move or have long enough turns. But it is my way of learning as well.
This occurs with movies too. I have a long list of movies that I am "expected" to watch because "oh Chrissy you have to watch that movie." Of course, once again, far from my movie repertoire of Stepmom, Harry Potter and Left Behind movies. However, I am willing to expand my repertoire, as I am interested, yet I don't think I will ever be up to par with my "family." Maybe they're the weird ones, knowing way too much about popular culture. I think I may do a study on this very phenomenon. Perhaps I am among the norm (erm, somewhat). Who knows? I guess I will continue to be sentenced to a life of pillows being hucked at me because of my lack of knowledge about Queen.
"GO TO YOUR ROOM!"
CHRISSY

My Sister

Okay so this is my sister Amy, for those who don't know. (The bottom of the totem pole). She's 18, and she is my pride and joy! It's amazing to see how our relationship has grown over the last 18 years. When she was born, I was one of those odd kids who wasn't jealous of a new baby in the house; I was actually excited and as she grew, I couldn't help but fall in love with her. She had such a fun personality, and I kind of began to feel responsible for her, I had to take care of her.
Well as we got older, and started getting out of home school and into the real world, we drifted apart. She had her friends, and I had mine. We were no longer each other's best friends, like we had been for ten years. It stayed this way for quite a while. We didn't get along well at all through school. We fought all the time, we had different attitudes and beliefs, we had different friends and were always at each other's throats. There were lots of tears and lots of hurt and lots of mean and nasty words said to each other. It makes me laugh how much we seemed to "hate" each other, but whenever stuff happened at home, emotional stuff with our parents, we always had each other, which was ironic, because that was the only time we got along. It was the one thing we had in common.
Finally, we "grew up." Now, I think we get along better than we ever had. We talk, we laugh, we have pillow fights and beat each other up (in a fun sort of way) and hang out a lot. It's amazing to watch her grow, but I still feel responsible for her and I feel the need to take care of her, but she is an adult now, who can take care of herself, but in my heart, she will always be my baby sister.
We're still so different, but we can still have fun together and talk about things and hang out and watch movies, and have sleepovers. Last night, we went to my mom's for her birthday, and Amy and I chased each other, and pushed each other off mom's bed with my mom in the background yelling about how we're going to hurt each other. (After she grabbed my camera and shot some pictures - thanks for the help mom :D). Meanwhile my sister is creaming me. She's a lot stronger than she used to be, but even as a child, a foot shorter than me, she managed to pin me down all the time with her secret weapon involving my pinky finger. (Don't ask - we were weird children).
Anyway, my sister is still my best friend, and she will continue to be my baby sister as she grows and as I grow.

CHRISSY

Feeling Stressed

Okay, I think I'm starting to feel that things are catching up to me. I mean if you think about everything I've got going on right now. I go to school four days a week, I work 2 days a week, and I plan for youth group once a week, which now does not only include a Bible study, but an opening worship time, which is a little more stressful than I anticipated. (Don't worry Kari, I just need to get used to it). That doesn't seem like a lot, but this semester, I have 4 essays, 6 tests, 4 exams, and a presentation, most of which are due in the same clustered time periods. I'm not kidding, why is it that Universities have to insist on making sure that everything has to be due at the exact same time????? Not only that, but I have personal issues that are kind of gnawing on the back of my ankles, but I'm trying so hard not to let them bother me, because I know worrying isn't going to make anything better, but it's just annoying that everything is happening so quickly. I have no doubt that I'll get through it; God got me through last year, and last semester, I know I'll survive, but I'm just starting to feel it. On Saturday, I left work early because I felt sick but I was fine after a bit of sleep and down time. I'm thinking it was either stress or exhaustion. It felt good, nonetheless. But I've had an ongoing headache for a few days now. I have Avalanche coming up in two weeks, so trying to get that ready and set up is hard, as well as wondering what the diagnosis for my ears will be in two weeks when I go see the specialist. I'm just at the point where I need a good scream.
But the good news is that a year ago, there's no way I would be handling the mass amounts of stress under my belt as calmly as I am now. I'm not saying it's easy now, but I think I've learned better how to handle my emotions and look at the truth. The truth is, I will survive, I'll get by, and I'll be okay.
But please pray for me, that I wouldn't feel so overwhelmed, because it makes it really hard to focus on certain things (like worshiping God) sometimes, especially when I can't seem to stop having nightmares!

CHRISSY

Out By The Lake

On yesterday's date (January 8), a year ago, Kari took me down to this lake where I wanted to symbolically give cutting over to God forever. It was in this spot where I prayed for freedom and threw my razor blade into the lake. The weight was lifted from my shoulders.
So yesterday, Kari once again took me to the same place, just for closure, I guess. I'm not exactly sure why I wanted to go back to that place. (I call it Cutter's End). The place represents more to me than just giving up cutting. It represents friendship (with Kari), finding God more strongly in my life, trusting Him. It is a place that kind of reminds me of how much my life has changed since last year. Throwing the razor blade in the sea began for me a journey of self-discovery, and trusting more in God. Kari and I prayed together yesterday, as the freezing cold wind blew against us, but it was great. It gave me a lot of closure, feeling very strongly that I knew I never wanted to walk down that road again.
I know it's just a place, and I know I can experience God everywhere I go. As a writer, I guess I see Cutter's End as more than just a place. It's a special place to me, and everytime I drive past it, I'm reminded of how much God has helped me through the past year and how it wouldn't have been possible without Him. I know this all the time, no matter where I am, but Cutter's End was the place where it started to happen. Praise God for helping me through all of this and being the Savior of my soul.
CHRISSY

Hospital Fears

Okay so yesterday, Ceilidh got her tonsils out, and for me, this experience has been very strange. A couple of days before the surgery, Brad and Michelle were discussing the procedure that would take place through brochures and stuff they were given. They were talking about the gas mask and the anesthesia and how there was a possibility it could make her sick. They talked about what they would tell Ceilidh. That she would be a fighter pilot and it would smell like strawberries.
Then it hit me like a ton of bricks! The weirdest thing ever! Memories began to rush over me, so many at once. The smell of the gas masks, the needles, the IV, the colors of the walls, the guy in the corner of the room getting the needles ready, the clip on my toe, the strange stuffed animals that weren't mine, the lady carrying me into the room, with something sharp sticking into my back, blood coming from my ears, spilling Tylenol all over the bed, the elevators, the playroom with the weird blocks and cupboard in the corner that you weren't supposed to touch, the food I never ate, except for the Jell-O, the car track, the coloring, the girl I thought was a boy until she wore her normal clothes. Seriously, it was so vivid, and from being in the hospital 8 times, I guess there were a lot of memories. I froze and Michelle wondered what was wrong, and I told her. Like I was shaking, and later, I almost cried. I couldn't believe how sudden and how vivid the memories came. It wasn't like I had forgotten all about those 8 times in the hospital, but it's not something I think about very often I guess.
And now I'm getting worried because my ear specialist appointment is on the 25th of January, and there's a chance I may have to have that surgery again. I'm a little nervous just because I've had enough hospital visits.

CHRISSY

Back to Blogging

Hey everyone! It's so good to be able to blog again. I really have to get my internet at home up and running.
I had the most amazing Christmas, spending time with Brad, Michelle and the kids, as well as my sister, and my extended family. I met some new people and learned some new things and got some great gifts. The only downfall is that right after Christmas, I was thrown into what we at my job call "The week from he**." This is because it is the busiest time for us. We had 3500 balloons to inflate in the span of 4 1/2 days. Divide that by 7 employees, that rounds out to be about 111 balloons that I'm inflating each day, give or take mind you, considering the customers coming in off the street, as well as other jobs that need to be done, like decorating. Above is a picture of me at a hotel, decorating for New Years. I'm setting up balloons clusters, and I did about 35 of them all together. Yes, by this point in the picture, my neck is sore, my back is sore from getting down on the ground like that and straining my neck to look up to make sure the cluster is the right height.
It was good though. I got closer to a lot of people this holiday. I got closer with some people at work. New Years Eve, me and two of my friends from work went to see a movie, and then we went to a bar and had some drinks and now two certain people won't leave me alone, convinved that I was "hungover." (I had 2 glasses of Sex On The Beach and a small glass of champagne. Yes, you can laugh. I had Sex on the Beach.)
I also got closer to my "family." At first I thought the uplifted spirits would only last for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, but the good mood has carried through and everybody just seems so happy and I'm really glad to see Michelle feeling better about things. I'm really glad I'm feeling better too. Man, life really changes when you just trust God to help you through, rather than dwell on things that make you upset. I'm the happiest I've ever been.
Oh, and for anyone who knows me, I need some help. My New Years resolution is to try new things. This includes, especially, foods, but also things like rollar coasters, or things that usually scare me. You only live life once, right?
CHRISSY